16 Days Left

My bestfriend Xena Maria Bael comes home in 16 days. I can’t wait. I’ve literally been waiting for her to come home since she left the last time. Our friendship hasn’t been the best. We’ve been in the lows, the rock bottom and still digging lows. Yet we made it work. 

We get mad at each other. We argue about retarded things. We even at some times kept things to ourselves cause we didn’t know how it would be taken by the other. But through all of that we end up telling each other what’s going on, we work through the argument and we make it work. 

She’s been my bestfriend since the 8th grade. We have a rough freshman year. I spent 10th grade being ignorant to the truth and disliking her. But last summer, we fixed it. She’s the kind of friend that no matter how much tension ever came between us, all it took was us hanging out the first day for us to know that our friendship is going to last. 

We’re going to be old and the same as now. Talking to our grandkids about the dumb stuff we did and making jokes about her being a ‘cat lady’ and so many other things. 16 days feels like forever, but it’s a lot shorter than the year I started with. Adventures awaits (: 

Chill Summer Nights. The crazy endless conversations, or silent moments of game/computer tweaking while only music plays. 

Drunk Apologies, they’re funny.

Summer (:

I knew once it started, it’d be great and I was right :) 

Can’t wait for the adventures to keep getting better. 

My bestfriend, she has this really big problem. She doesn’t believe in herself. Today is tryouts for the cheerleading team and she doesn’t think she’ll make it. Her mind is clouded by the fact that she is both humble and nervous. I know she’ll make it and she’ll have fun trying out. I’m glad to have her as a bestfriend and I can’t wait for all the cheerleader jokes I can make after she makes the team. 

Do I say anything or do I let things be?

I mean on one side it’s not my problem so why stress.

But on the other, I would want to know if I was in that situation. 

That moment when you look at something you shouldn’t and find out something you’re not meant to know and your entire perspective changes. 

Today was my last day of school and now it’s summer of 2012.

I’ve been saying summer needs to hurry up and come but now that it’s here, it doesn’t feel any different.

We didn’t take last day of school pictures, talk about how much we’re going to miss each other or anything like that. 

But its summer and I wish it would feel like it’s here. 

I wish it would just hit me and it’d be amazing! 

I hate how I care but you think I don’t. I’m sorry the last time I decided to have a heart you decided to tear it apart. 

Trust You?

I want to trust you. The past tells me not to. But I don’t want to live in the past and living there and learning from it has the thinnest line possible separating it. 

One day I want to write something so meaningful and full of impact that people can’t help but try to analyze it without a single negative outcome. 

I wish I could stay mad at you. But then that would be no fun.